After receiving a text from a friend this morning, I find myself charging into a rather uncomfortable situation…willingly.

No time like the present, right?

I previously posted about the decision of to be or not to be….a Classical Conversations Tutor.

I’m a homeschool mom to four kiddos and after having used a curriculum called Classical Conversations with them at home for the last 3 years, I have decided that this upcoming year we will join a local community where once a week we gather and the kids attend a class with a tutor to learn the new information for that week.

I am good friends with the director of the community and she has asked me if I wanted to tutor.  I opted for a big fat NO, mainly because the thought of standing up in front of 7 little people, with my hand on full display, especially when hand motions are a significant part helping the kids memorize their information, was not at all appealing.

With that decision of no I felt good.  It felt right.  It was a little strange because I truly love teaching and aside from the hand issue, Tutoring is exactly the kind of thing that appeals to me.  Nevertheless, she found someone else to fill that spot, and all was well.  Until…

She texted me this morning.  The woman who committed to tutor backed out last night, leaving a class full of kids with no one available to fill that role.

“Hi- just wondering if you would be interested in tutoring your boys class?.?.?.?”

It seemed an appropriate question and the appropriate time — completely unbeknownst to her.

This website is about stepping out of my comfort zone, it’s about speaking on a topic that for me has been a topic of secrecy, privacy and embarrassment.

My book is about stepping out of my comfort zone.  Taking a very private topic and displaying it for any and all to see.

I have told more people in the last 3 months about Poland Syndrome than in the previous 3 years.

So why not take this next step, which is more like a giant leap?

I have until mid-August to develop a strategy for addressing it.  I do think it will need to be addressed, directly, unless I want a room full of little kids staring at my hand.

I need a strategy for handling hand motions when I simply do not have the dexterity or digits to perform many of the signs.  Said strategy will likely include communication with the kids AND with their moms, as parents sit in with their kiddos in the classes.

The very condition that I sought to hide for so very long is about to become common knowledge among the people I see on a daily basis.  I am both excited and scared half to death.  And I highly anticipate it being no big deal to those who come to learn my big secret.